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For You, For Me
Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Death has been foreign to me for years. I experienced it very rarely: My grandfather, my paternal great-uncle, a second-degree uncle, and a very dear cousin. Seventeen years, four deaths. It hasn't been a rough ride, I must admit. For a while, it will suck the strength out of me. After crying it out, I've always managed to bounce back.

It doesn't mean that the weeks following each death hurts a lot less. Because it does. It's true when they say words can never express the immense feelings of grief, and love. It's also true that these feelings are overwhelming.

I am overwhelmed. After the day of day full of pure joy that I experience yesterday, I would never have expected to be sucked out of the world today.

Tita Tuyang has always been a lovely, caring, friend. She hides her coke in neutral containers because she's forbidden to ever drink soft drinks again. At an age over seventy, she'd readily give up her seat to offer to young children. She spends a lot of her days inside the church, participating in various ways. She has loved me and gave me all the love she can possibly afford. She endured what people may never endure in the course of their lifetime. She took in two second-degree grandchildren whole-heartedly. Words can't even describe the immensity of the goodness reigning in her heart. I loved her, I adored her, she has been very dear to me. She was my Mom's rock.

Ten minutes ago, I found out she passed away.

I felt all the energy vaccumed from my entirety. All the memories of her came rushing back. Moving on without her laid itself before my eyes. I couldn't breathe.

It didn't sink in. It hasn't sink in. It wouldn't sink in.

I laughed with her a lot when we saw this picture, two years ago.
Death will not end your love for us.
Death will not end our love for you.
Rest peacefully.
I love you.

Photobucket
14:02

Don't You Know Who I Think I Am?

Photobucket

Bianca Ruiz;
17;
Assumption Antipolo;
Ateneo de Manila University;
Management Engineering;
Occupation: Professional sleeper; Addiction: The faded era of the orange ball & persuation & color pigments;
True Addiction: Me&You.

Out To Me

Dead
Double Dead
Y!M
anca613703@yahoo.com
Email
anca613703@yahoo.com
mariabiancaleanneruiz@yahoo.com
biancaruizmatters@yahoo.com

I Constantly Thank God For Esteban Hearts

* scent of paint
* Books (with the S)
* Debate!
* Basketball (End Here)
* Tickets and jellybeans
* Reese's
* sofas
* Da Vinci, Monet, Progress, Progressive
* loving && much more loving
* Touch screen @-)
* Candy && Chocolate Bars && String Cheese!

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